Who am I?
We all get those 10, 50, or 100 questions email that asks you to give your favorite color and other crap, then forward it on to all your friends (all 4 of them) so you can share the detailed life info (sarcasm) and find out there favorite color or movie.
Ever hear anybody say looking over the dead body of a lost friend or family member, "If only I knew their favorite color, things would have been different."
So to address this issue, I have created the Dave Floss 25 things you should know about a person, plus their favorite color just in case.
1. Where were you born?
2. Was it planned or are you God’s little surprise?
3. What illness’ do you have?
4. Can I catch any of them from you?
5. How many sexual partners have you had?
6. How many do you regret?
7. How did you parents punish you?
8. How many scars do you have?
9. Are any of them “internal” or “emotional”?
10. Have you even contemplated suicide?
11. Did you commit suicide?
12. If you tried and failed at suicide, did it just make you feel more like a loser?
13. Are you married?
14. Happily?
15. Did you answer yes to “Happily” because your spouse is watching you or may get this email?
16. Do you have kids?
17. Do you still want them? Some of them? Waiting on an offer?
18. How much money would it take for you to leave everything you have behind after taxes?
19. Would you even kill another human being?
20. Would you do it for the right price?
21. If so, how much? Just looking to get the best value.
22. If you could change one thing about you, what would it be?
23. Really? I would have said that huge ass on two donkey legs. But okay.
24. Did you read this list hoping it was just another one of those fun, “get to know you” lists? If so, read the title and get a fucking clue.
25. Do you even know who I am/ The creator of the list, not the moron who actually sent it to you.
26. Oh yeah, what is your favorite color and why? You can actually skip this if you like, no one fucking cares. You are just another name on an old, outdated, distribution list. I say retry number 10.
Ever hear anybody say looking over the dead body of a lost friend or family member, "If only I knew their favorite color, things would have been different."
So to address this issue, I have created the Dave Floss 25 things you should know about a person, plus their favorite color just in case.
1. Where were you born?
2. Was it planned or are you God’s little surprise?
3. What illness’ do you have?
4. Can I catch any of them from you?
5. How many sexual partners have you had?
6. How many do you regret?
7. How did you parents punish you?
8. How many scars do you have?
9. Are any of them “internal” or “emotional”?
10. Have you even contemplated suicide?
11. Did you commit suicide?
12. If you tried and failed at suicide, did it just make you feel more like a loser?
13. Are you married?
14. Happily?
15. Did you answer yes to “Happily” because your spouse is watching you or may get this email?
16. Do you have kids?
17. Do you still want them? Some of them? Waiting on an offer?
18. How much money would it take for you to leave everything you have behind after taxes?
19. Would you even kill another human being?
20. Would you do it for the right price?
21. If so, how much? Just looking to get the best value.
22. If you could change one thing about you, what would it be?
23. Really? I would have said that huge ass on two donkey legs. But okay.
24. Did you read this list hoping it was just another one of those fun, “get to know you” lists? If so, read the title and get a fucking clue.
25. Do you even know who I am/ The creator of the list, not the moron who actually sent it to you.
26. Oh yeah, what is your favorite color and why? You can actually skip this if you like, no one fucking cares. You are just another name on an old, outdated, distribution list. I say retry number 10.
posted by Davey Bones @ 6:22 AM
1 comments
1 Comments:
so sweet...
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